In 2019, I have been practicing shifting my language.

Language is programming. How we talk to ourselves, is us talking to our nervous systems.

"Positive/negative" are words that I attempt to use primarily to describe polarity--but not persons, places or things...anymore, anyhow! (It's a programming practice).

A different perspective has been serving me well, thus far:

1. Is it practical?
2. Is it preferable?
3. Is it pleasant? me? (Because everyone is different, so these answers vary as much as people do.)

At least 2/3 must be satisfied.

If it is truly practical, then there will likely be no harm done, to myself or others; as self-harm and harming others is not practical...and IT CAN BE PUT INTO PRACTICE, which means that it is do-able.

Sometimes, the preferable and pleasant overtake the practical; and that's okay, too--in moderation. 

If it can be all 3, then absolutely, YES!!! 

If 2/3, definitely MAYBE.

If less than, then NO.

If not at all, then definitely NO--change directions, express boundaries, remove yourself, seek other options...

As grown-ups, most of us are free to do that; we maybe could not, when we were children...quite likely, we had to bend the conditions we in, or break. 

It sure is nice to be a grown-up!

Yes, there may be more responsibilities--but I may thankfully choose them; or respectfully decline them. 


We are not always able to enact it, but the more we do, the easier it gets.